Soothing the Senses to Ground and Decrease Anxiety

Today we are demystifying the mindfulness idea of grounding. If “grounding” has felt elusive to you or you benefit from it but aren’t sure how to help your child ground, this exercise is for you. We have some tips for grounding through your senses, a tool the whole family can use. You are probably already doing many of these and like so many of the skills we discuss, the goal is to help you identify your personal tools while also teaching you a few new ones.

Let’s first look at why we ground. When we become over stimulated with new information or experiences, our nervous system activates and starts working over time, which is when you feel the uncomfortable sensations such as racing heart, sweating, maybe even shortness of breath, a sense of dread or panic. It’s like an alarm system has gone off and our body is trying to manage it to ensure we are safe. Having tools we know work to soothe our nervous system and decrease anxiety are like having the passcode for our system.

The other benefit of grounding techniques is that they bring us physically into our body. When we feel our mind connected to our body we tend to experience more calm, we have better insight into our response to experience, we trust our intuition more, our self-esteem is improved and we have a more positive view of our physical body- not to mention we are more attuned to the physical health of our body. So beyond decreasing the discomfort of anxiety it really benefits our children to regularly ground into their bodies.

So how do you introduce such a big idea to your child? I would start by having your child draw a body map, this is like a gingerbread person, as if you were tracing around someone laying on the ground. Do this activity while they are calm and in good spirits- don’t attempt this activity when their nervous system has already become activated. Then it’s harder to think clearly and they may mistake the assignment for a punishment. This map gives you the chance to discuss the 5 senses Vision, Hearing, Smell, Taste and Touch. Have them add soothing activities to the body map and encourage them to draw pictures or if they are older to write the activity where it would physically soothe them. Listening to music may soothe their ears and mind. I have also added a Social-Emotional sense because for so many kids this one is important. They become overwhelmed by the emotions and energy of others and if this sounds like your child you may want to include it as well. Soothing activities for this may be added somewhere on the body or outside the body. There is no right way to do this activity, let them get creative. Maybe your child will follow this in a moment of stress or maybe they won’t. Maybe you help them think of 12 ways to ground but they only use one- that is success! And remember that every conversation you have about self-soothing deepens their permission to care for themselves and helps them continue to identify healthy coping as an available option. When they are stressed, you're helping their brain create this habit of saying, What are my options to take care of myself here?

VISION OR THINGS THAT RELAX OUR EYES:
Take a walk and identify interesting or beautiful buildings. Look at the nature around you. Find animals to observe. Right now we can’t go to a museum but find art or photography exhibits online. Pick or buy flowers and let your child place it somewhere. Sit in the backyard together if you have a garden. Star gaze or watch clouds.

HEARING OR THINGS THAT CALM OUR EARS:
Listen to beautiful or soothing music, or use a sound machine with ocean waves, the rainforest or white noise.  Listen to the noises a pet makes. Go outside and listen to the birds chirping. Sing to your child. Let them sing to you or a sibling.

SMELL OR SMELLS THAT MAKE OUR NOSE HAPPY:
If you bake your child’s favorite treat or meal, have them join you in the kitchen to enjoy the smell. Have your child smell a their food. If you have a garden help them smell different flowers or veggies. Or take deep breaths while on a walk to smell nature or at least outside. Let them help choose a scented candle or essential oil to diffuse.

TASTE OR FOOD AND DRINKS THAT RELAX OUR BODY:
Bake together and then enjoy a special treat- help your child savor each bite by describing what their treat tastes and feels like. Drink a soothing drink like herbal tea or hot chocolate. Pick fruits or veggies from a garden and taste them. Make your child favorite meal and help them savor it.

TOUCH OR THINGS THAT FEEL GOOD ON OUR BODY: Take a bubble bath. Cuddle with a parent or sibling. Pet your cat or dog. Change into comfy clothes or pajamas. Use a weighted blanket. Snuggle with a favorite stuffed animal. Get a back rub. Play in the sprinklers or go swimming. Play in a sand box. Squeeze play-doh or kinetic sand.

SOCIAL-EMOTIONAL OR SPACE I NEED FROM OTHER PEOPLE’S FEELINGS: (To help your child understand this, point out something that happened earlier that day- maybe a sibling was excited and wanted to play but they didn’t OR a parent was worried about a work deadline and your child shut down. “I was wondering if your sister’s big feelings of excitement, or mom’s big worried feelings were stressful for you? That happens and sometimes we want to tale space from feeling someone else’ feelings.”) Watch a movie to take a break from socializing. Spend time with a parent one on one. Take a break alone in a bedroom or another preferred space.